Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
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