I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
He? As in you personified your dick?
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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