is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
We just shotgunned beers for America
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
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