What a fucking waste of an outfit
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Randomize
