Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
