So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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