You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Randomize
