You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
