Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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