I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
