The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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