the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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