If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Randomize
