Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
