Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Is it penis luge time yet?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
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