Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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