I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
