We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize
