Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
