Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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