...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
