you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
