I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
