I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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