We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
