I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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