this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
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