Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Randomize
