Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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