Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
