He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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