WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize