We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
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