I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
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