what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
