I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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