I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
