Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Shitshow foam night was such a success
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
