its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
