Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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