I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
"it" just moved
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
