I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
