my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize
