i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
