No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
You pole danced in your parka.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
