I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize
