Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
You can't just leave with hair like that
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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