Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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