Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
