i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Randomize
