My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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