Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Randomize
